Standing Still

I've been doing it for what seems like forever. Every once in a while in my life I become content with where I am - everything seems to be exactly how I want it to be. I decide I want nothing to change, because what I don't see is the beautiful new opportunity just around the corner. I admit it - I am afraid of change. I've never admitted that before, and I'm willing to bet that very few people would have guessed it. I'm afraid that the next stage of life will not be as good as the last, and I'm usually wrong. I'm actually very good at adapting to change, and rolling with it, but it scares me. Now, in the thick of change as everyone graduates, goes home for the summer break, leaves on a mission, or what have you, I might shy away from saying more than just "bye," or, "see ya!" Don't take it personally. I'm really bad a goodbyes, so I'm sorry to anyone who I make or have made feel less important with my short, almost careless goodbye. I do care. Plus, if we really are friends, we'll run into each other again at some point. Anyway, good luck to everybody who is currently making a change in their life, whether big or small.

This Week

This week has been interesting, to say the least. First, Aleesa broke up with me for some other guy. She said that I'm too hairy, and that she is crazy, and that his cheeks are more pink than mine. haha I was just kidding. But seriously:) We made a mutual decision, and that decision is that it is in our best interest to break up. Sad, but we are both ok with it, and it was great while it lasted. After that, I woke up one morning, and there was poop and other sewage floating in our dorm hall. Shnasty, right? I guess the pipes got clogged up and flowed backward. The smell was horrible, but they cleaned it up pretty quickly, and for that I am grateful. I should have taken pictures. When I say there was poop floating around the halls, I do not exaggerate. Today I took the first of 3 Chemistry final exams - 3!!! It was our lab final, and we have a final exam, and a nationally standardized exam left to take. That's just for chem, and I have 5 other class finals to take. haha The picture of the chalkboard is not a far cry from what some of our chemistry problems look like on paper. Well, I know I recently said I couldn't wait for Thanksgiving break, but that wasn't really a break, because homework infected every day of it, and now I can't wait for Christmas break. I get to go home to my family for a couple of weeks, shoot some guns, and maybe hit the beach. Tonight for FHE we went caroling. It was interesting, because some of us (me) didn't know all of the words, and I sort of just belted out random words that I thought sounded right. At any rate, that's my week. Now I'm starting the the last week of classes. Then it's finals, and finally home. Oh, and I get to spend the first 10 days of Christmas with my good friend Chelsea. That's all for now :)

Follow the Leader

What, exactly, is a leader? A leader is a person who holds office, and has rank, and who makes decisions on behalf of another person, or people, right? Right! But that type of leadership may only be temporary. We define a leader as someone who is sensible, responsible, trustworthy, brave, etc. I'm sure we can all think of a leader in our lives. I know a leader who won't be told what to do. He won't be pushed around, or swayed, and he doesn't waste his time playing footsies with drama, or gossip. He tells people when they are acting dumb, and he solves problems. I look up to him even though I am older, and I am supposed to be the example. My brother is a leader, and he always has been. His peers look up to him, and value his opinion, because nine times out of ten, he will give you a sound solution that will get results. One out of ten times he will be wrong, but that's ok, because he is not insecure, and he can take responsibility for his decisions. I can't adequately define what a leader is, so here are some things that I think outline the character of a leader. (from the internet)

Solve problems. The first step towards becoming a leader is to look around and find ways to make the world a better place. Observe your surroundings and listen to people. How can you help? Discover what your talents are, develop them, and focus on applying them towards making a difference. Think of problems in the broader sense - they're not always easy to define. Look for needs, niches, conflicts, gaps that need to be filled, and inefficiencies. The solutions won't always be creative or cutting edge; sometimes they're the simplest things.

Think of the big picture. As you're solving problems, you might notice patterns, and wonder if many of those problems are symptoms of a deeper, bigger problem. Thoreau once said, "For every thousand hacking at the leaves of evil, one is hacking at the root." Take a step back and try to find the root. The thing about the deeper problem is that it's not something anybody can solve alone; it'll require a group effort, which is where your role as a leader comes into play.

Be proactive. If you've got these ideas in your mind about what the deeper issues are, you can probably predict the problems that'll crop up as a result. Instead of waiting for those problems to appear, take steps to prevent them. If you can't prevent them, then you can at least prepare. That's the core difference between a leader and a manager. A good manager responds well to a variety of situations; a good leader takes effective action to prevent and create situations before they actually happen.

Make decisions, and take responsibility for the consequences. In order to exert influence and tackle bigger problems, you're going to need decision-making power, and those decisions will affect the people who grant you that power. This is as much a responsibility as it is an honor. Not only do you need to be able to make sound decisions, but you also need to be willing to be held accountable to them. If things go wrong, people will assume it's your fault (whether it is or not). Think of yourself as the captain of a ship; the fate of the ship is essentially in your hands, and it's up to you to steer everyone in the right direction. So exercise wisdom when calling the shots; hope for the best and prepare for the worst. If you're not prepared to take responsibility for your decisions - if you struggle with hesitation and self-doubt - it might be a good idea to step down. An insecure leader often becomes a tyrant.

Share your vision. As a leader, you can see the bigger issues at hand, but you can also see how things could be so much better if we could just remove those obstacles. To get people to help you in changing things, you need to share that positive vision with them. Inspire them. Motivate them. Guide them. Show them how their actions are bringing everyone closer to that dream. "Most important, leaders can conceive and articulate goals that lift people out of their petty preoccupations and unite them in pursuit of objectives worthy of their best efforts."^[1]

Remember that it's not all about you. The greatest leaders saw their role as a means to an end, and themselves as an instrument of a deeper purpose; any glory, prestige, or wealth was a side effect rather than a motivation. If you want to realize a vision, the most effective way to do it is not with an army of drones; that army will only last as long as you do. For the most long-lasting results, share your vision and let people adopt it as their own, and let it spread like wildfire. Think of yourself as the beginning of a chain reaction--once it's begun, you can step away and it'll continue to happen without any effort on your part. "A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves."^[2]

That's all I have to say about that.

Anyway, lots of things have happened since I posted my last blog. I am back in school! And, I can't wait for the semester to be over. This has been a tough one. I got a mac - great purchase! I recommend the macbook pro to anybody, unless excel is the only reason you have a computer. Excel for mac has some weird things about it. Most importantly... after months of her asking, I finally gave in and decided to date Aleesa Young. Ok, fine - I was the one asking her to date me. It only took a year to win her over - a long year - and, it was frustrating sometimes. Sometimes I was about ready to give up. She would tell me about dates she went on, and the guys she liked, and twice she even told me we would never be together. It was hard, but I wasn't about to let go - not that easily. So, I was patient, and I did everything I knew to be her best friend. I moved back to Idaho, and we grew closer. I was so confused! My head and my heart were at war (like the picture above), and it was so hard to think clearly. So, one night I decided to make my move, but then I chickened out. I think Aleesa knew this, but she was nice, and she made it clear the next night, and took me to a private place. She made it so easy for me, but somehow I almost screwed it up again! I waited so freaking long that she got up to leave, and I almost missed my opportunity again, but I pulled her back to me and we sorted things out:) Long story short, we made our relationship official on September 25th, so it has been about 2 months! She's sensible, and safe, and I never thought I would ever date a girl like her, but she is simply amazing, and I could never ask for anything better. I am so lucky to have her. the end.

Gifted Hands

The most inspiring movie I have ever seen is Gifted Hands. It's a movie about a skilled neurosurgeon who got to where he is from unlikely circumstances. I have seen it many times, and I like it more and more every time I see it. When I need some motivation for anything at all, I watch this movie. Basically, Ben Carson grew up in an underprivileged home without a father. He was behind in his first few years of schooling, but his mother was hopeful, supportive, and so positive about the future of her two boys. After some encouragement, He excels through school, attends Yale University on scholarship, and finally gets to Johns Hopkins Medical School. It expresses some of the obstacles he had to overcome, mostly because of discrimination, and a hot temper. Ends up, Ben Carson is now the Director of Pediatric Neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins Medical Center (real life), and has performed successful surgeries that are still considered miracles. Ben Carson is a very religious man, and is dedicated to his work, and to his family. I hope I can be half the scholar, surgeon, and man he is. Lately I've been thinking about joining an organization for a few weeks in Ughanda, South Africa, Ecuador, or somewhere like that to do some volunteer health care. I'm just doing my homework to find a reputable organization to join. :)